Welcome my dear friends. Enjoy your visit and share your thoughts. Thank you, much love

Saturday, 5 December 2015

How Being an Empath is Connected to Spiritually Awakening Part 2

How Being an Empath is Connected to Spiritually Awakening Part 2

Hi, dear friend and followers. Today I would like to share with you part 2 of  Empaths Spiritually Connected. Thank you very much for reading my blog. The orange Notes are my own

Krznaric later goes on to reveal that empathy has declined by nearly 50% in the past 40 years. A study in 2007 also revealed that alexithymia is directly tied with a lack of empathy.

Other than a lack of empathy, alexithymic display numerous traits that are extremely common in the people of our day and age. These include:

Lack of intuition.

Restricted imagination and emphasis on the logical and realistic.

Outbursts of crying and fits of rage appearing to come from nowhere.

Inability to identify and describe what one is feeling (poor emotional intelligence).

Difficulty in relationships (adopting the role of the dependent, dominant, or distant partner).

Impulsive acts or compulsive behaviors.

The tendency towards obesity (binge eating), anorexia, bulimia, sex addiction, substance abuse, anxiety disorders, fibromyalgia, personality disorders, migraines, depression.

Social isolation and an inability to connect or identify with others.

However, if you have experienced an awakening as an alexithymic, or a shift in consciousness from “unaware” to “aware,” you’re most likely experiencing the following symptoms:

Social anxiety or phobia as a result of being bombarded with too much verbal, emotional and physical data.

Intense self-consciousness, or being painfully aware of how other people perceive you.

Tumultuous emotions. You will begin to feel your emotions rather than hide from them or channel them into unhealthy habits such as binge eating, alcoholism, workaholism, etc. Because you are emotionally inexperienced, you experience many highs and lows in emotions, not knowing how to stabilize and harmonize yourself internally.

Confusion between your emotions and other’s emotions. You might jump to one extreme and think that you have borderline personality disorder or another disorder – or, you might jump to the other extreme and blame everyone else for the way you feel, adopting a classic victim complex.

Low self-esteem. As a result of being thrown in the deep end, so to speak, you might personally feel and inter-personally inadequate because of your heightened sensitivity to the world. You might beat yourself up, think you’re stupid, think you’re weak, think you're mentally ill, or any other number of self-criticisms.

You are more in touch with your body. You might begin to take care of your health more, change diets, change cosmetics, try to overcome any addictions you have, and generally take care of yourself more.

You will be more sensitive to the beauty and horror of the world. As a newly awakened soul, you will experience the world much more deeply – this has its positives and negatives, and can result in pure joy or severe unhappiness.

My awakening started in the twelve step rooms, after a few years attending twelve step meetings I felt a desire to return the help I received from them, this was where my career as a social worker began, by serving in the 12 step groups. I then went on to serving in soup kitchens and street centers. Took a course in social work in the evenings. After graduation, I went on to working with street people and mental health consumers. 22 years altogether. 

During this time my spirituality also grew. Spending more time in nature helped me to find peace within myself. The forest became my church. I always loved using imagination and I satisfied that part within me through the medium of fantasy movies. I also exerciced my imagination through pen and paper. After I got a home computer I transferred all of my short stories on hard-drive. Now it all resides on this blog. This blog is my life's struggle getting through the hard times in my life. This was my escape from all the terrible things that go on in the world. My spiritual growth in a nutshell.

You have the sudden craving to express yourself creatively, but you don't know how or where to start.

The transition from alexithymic to empathic can be compared to a pendulum. The pendulum swings from one extreme to the other, but eventually through time it slows to a halt, to a balance between two extremes. How do you find that stability? There is a lot of bad advice out there on the web, so let me share with you what I learned through trial and error.

The Empath Fledgling Guide to Creating Inner Balance

I will be expanding upon this topic in a future article (it deserves one of its own!), but for now I’ll provide you with a few basic pointers.

1. Forget “Shielding” – Try Non-Resistance and Non-Attachment

Many articles and many websites suggest, “shielding” techniques to “protect you” from the emotions of others. Firstly, this advice uses the language of victimhood which is counterproductive to becoming a balanced empathic. I’ve personally tried using “invisible eggs,” “walls” and so forth before, but I've found it not only completely ineffective but too mentally draining as well.

Instead of using shielding techniques, simply open yourself. Simply be. Don’t fight, don’t resist, for your resistance will create continuous tension within you – which you certainly don’t need.

Non-resistance is paradoxically the most simple thing to do in the world, but it can also be very difficult as we are so used to resisting ourselves, other people, time, and life in general.

But non-resistance isn’t simply about letting everything and anything come – it is also about non-attachment or letting emotions come and go without identifying with them. Non-attachment requires you to be self-aware in the present moment of what you are feeling. This can take time and practice.

Try asking yourself, “What am I feeling right now?” when you feel stressed, tense, or stuffy with emotions. Your answer might be something like, “I am feeling pain, worry, sadness and anxiety, but that is OK.” It is OK to feel the emotions. Open to them, but also let them pass by not adopting them as “yours.” Are your emotions “you?” No. You are much more than transient emotions which come and go.

I quite agree with this. I have learned on my own many years ago as I stated above, I would loose myself in imaginations, frustration? I have done my share of screaming or taking walks in nature if the weather was clement. If I was sad, I allowed myself to cry, no matter where I was, there are always public washrooms around. Singing? But of course, when I was happy, or even dancing is more my thing. Meditation is also another good way to release, like watching fall leaves flowing down a brook, each leaf floating away is letting go of a thought that has been bothering you

2. Try Somatic Mindfulness

Somatic mindfulness is basically a way of anchoring you firmly in the present moment (and not getting lost in the hurricane of your thoughts and feelings) through focusing on your bodily sensations. This is complementary to the previous point of non-attachment and non-resistance which both require present moment awareness. Somatic mindfulness is extremely effective as it requires nothing other than your ability to feel sensations. Types of somatic mindfulness involve focusing on your breathing (deepening it), 
 blinking your eyes, your feet on the earth and the temperature of your body.

3. Run, Scream, Cry, Shout, Express

Catharsis is essential for every empath. In fact, it is essential for every human, regardless of their level of sensitivity as it dispels a lot of pent up energy. For empaths, this means getting rid of negative emotional residue from oneself and others.

Whatever you do, try to avoid going more than one day without engaging in some form of healthy catharsis. I’ve found that become lax in my habit of “cathartic” has promoted chronic pain in my body and unpleasant mood swings. Beneficial forms of catharsis ideal for empaths include exercise of any kind, screaming into a pillow, making a habit of crying every day, laughing (laughter therapy), or self-expression in the form of art.

Whatever works for you … make a habit of it daily!

There are many other ways of being a balanced empathic which I will elaborate on in a future article. Although you might be swinging like a pendulum through the extremes of your new shift in consciousness, remember that eventually through effort and persistence, you will come to a halt and achieve balance.

We all go through confusing and disorientating times in life, so you are not alone. I can vouch for that.

Do you have any experiences with being an empath or an alexithymic? Please share in the comments!
Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day. 

ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Friday, 4 December 2015

How Being an Empath is Connected to Spiritually Awakening

How Being an Empath is Connected to Spiritually Awakening

Hi, dear friends and followers. Today I wish to discuss with you on the topic of Spirituality and Empathy. Why does the phenomenon of empathy appear to diminish at times to almost one existence, then grow again. Thank you very much for taking your time to read my blog


I’m going to say something crazy.

I think we’re all empaths.

I believe that being an empath is actually our natural state of being.

Far from being an exclusive label or special group of people, I believe empaths are rife among us.

I believe men are empaths, women are empaths, children are empaths, the elderly are empaths, straight people are empaths, gay people are empaths, intergender are empaths, and throughout the entire world, I believe that empathy exist in every culture, every tradition, every religion and every continent.

The only thing is this:

most of us have lost touch with our abilities to tune into the feelings of others.

Why? Because most of us have lost touch with our ability to tune into the feelings of ourselves. Whether through our highly materialized, fast-paced, artificial societies; our long-held dogmas, traditions, beliefs and inner narratives; our physical and emotional diets; our lifestyle habits, or simply our belief that “everything we feel comes directly from us,” we have been severely desensitized in life.

We have become essentially “sensitivity maimed.”

We have become emotional illiterates.

In fact, most of us have become alexithymic – people that suffer from the inability to truly know, and put into words, what they are feeling. Hence our tendency to over-eat, our obesity crisis, our addictions to alcohol and drugs, our over-consumption of escapist TV shows, movies, and porn and our constant psychological issues such as anxiety and depression.

All of this comes as a direct result of lacking self-awareness, of trying to desperately patch up the emptiness and confusion we feel in life and inside.

We are truly, in the most extreme sense, out-of-touch with ourselves.

And so it’s no wonder that when we experience some kind of spiritual awakening – when we finally awaken from our “sleep” and experience a shift in consciousness – we become overwhelmed with not only our ability to understand and feel our own feelings but our ability to do likewise with others and their feelings. For some this descends as a tidal wave, for others, a gentle but increasing storm.

Suddenly we realize all along that many (not all) of the feelings that have been clogging us up have come as a result of actually feeling and taking on the emotions of others, empathically.

If this sounds like you, and if you are currently navigating through the disorientating waters of being an empath, you are not alone. I too have gone through this awakening experience and after some much-needed guidance and personal effort I have been able to obtain much greater mental and emotional clarity. Although I am not perfect (there will always be more to improve on), I want to share with you today some truly beneficial advice.

From Alexithymic to Empath

It is said that alexithymia is present in about 10% of the population, but I believe this figure is grossly downplayed. I believe that many of us were/are alexithymics.

As thinker and philosopher, Roman Krznaric comments in his book “Empathy: Why it Matters and How to Get it”:

At this moment in history, we are suffering from an acute empathy deficit, both as a society and in our individual lives.

He goes on to note that:
A recent study at the University of Michigan revealed a dramatic decline in empathy levels among young Americans between 1980 and today, with the steepest drop being in the last ten years. The shift, say researchers, is in part due to more people living alone and spending less time engaged in social and community activities that nurture empathic sensitivity

Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day.
ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Thursday, 3 December 2015

Assorted poetry and verse

Assorted poetry and verse by Cindy

Hi, dear friends and follower. Today I would like to share with you some more of my assorted poetry and verse. Thank you very much for visiting and reading.

The Nature of Nature
Composed by me +Cindy Groulx 

Like all of us, Nature has her emotions, too.
There are times when she gently weeps from sadness;
She shows her anger in raging storms.
She also can weep from happiness when replenishing the Earth,
And she shows her caring with every rainbow.
As you begin to feel sadness in the fall,
Mother nature does, too.
She seems to sigh dryly, wistfully, longing,
denuding the trees to appear dull and drab.
Again her mood changes, growing harsh and cold,
And the Earth is scolded like a naughty child!
Her winds rise from the north, and all turns frosty white.
Cold hearted she is as winter gales blow,
covering the land with a blanket of white.
Come the spring, blossoms bloom,
and once again the birds sing.
Nature is at peace with the world.
Her benevolence is seen in every forest and field
as she contentedly sings lullabies in the mountains,
and makes music with the surf on the beach.
She cradles new life in her arms as she watches
It grow and learn to walk and to fly and climb trees.
In summer, nature boils and goes into a “heated debate,” 
When the burning sun scorches all that it touches
And the heat torments almost every living thing.
Yes , Mother Nature can be quite hot-tempered,
Her conduct far from gentle and demure.
But after her rage she weeps in sorrow
for her tirade,
and her tears replenish life all about.

Dreams at Dusk
Composed by me +Cindy Groulx 

I feel exhilaration as I walk in the forest;
At dusk, I feel whole and alive again.
I feel real, I feel blessed, and grateful to be
here under the dazzling starlight above.
My heart sings, takes flight, and soars high above,
beyond the tree tops, and the mountain heights.
The forest below me sings my songs
As I drift by in an ocean of longing.
I find tranquility that gives me strength
And heals my heart and soothes my spirit.
At the pond’s edge I stop and turn myself thrice;
This was where thrice I have loved and felt love.
Dare I dream now of a new, harmonious world?
I fall asleep on the bank of the pond
Under dusk’s dreamy starlight, the first of the evening.
Into my dreams slip love and romance
Gliding in as I count the stars above.
They send me the visions of the one I know,
The only one whom I will ever love;
For there is no other for me.
In the mist the moon rises
As a beacon for this fairy.
I embrace its rays, the mist and all;
The sparkling stardust is like snow to my eyes.
I am now in the dream I have sought all this evening;
No more troubling thoughts will there be
as my mind moves with sure steps forward.
I am brave and I trust and I am all that I wish for,
relaxed and enchanted at the glistening falls.
Just where am I going and, oh, where have I been?
The hypnosis of the misty moon leads me on
And draws me ever deeper into my dream.

Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day.

In Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Wednesday, 2 December 2015

Assorted poem and verse

Assorted poem and verse

Hi, dear friends and followers. Welcome to my blog. Today I have a poem and a verse for you I hope you enjoy reading them, thank you.

Burning, in the cold of the neon sun.

A short poem by me +Cindy Groulx
I quietly sat

and let my spirit go,
in the setting sun's *
red and golden glow.
The horizon's ablaze
with the sunset's fire;
and there I sat waiting,
waiting for my beloved,
the one in the world
to return to me.
In a time long ago
he left my side and 
I was told there was no return.
But I choose to believe,
so here I sit and wait, burning,
in the cold of the neon sun.
I wish we could know
when to hold on 
and when to let go.

A walk in the forest

A short poem by me +Cindy Groulx

Have you ever felt something mystical in the clean, still forest air?
It is an invigorating feeling as you walk in the forest, like the air was electrified,
alive with an energy not normally felt in a heavily populated area.
Walking through forest stimulates so many of our senses, 
in ways that we might not otherwise have know we had. 
There is a spell cast when you come close to nature
and the trees. The dancing lights, the dark shadows, 
the mist, and the echo of bird songs,
bouncing off towering columns of bark and wood. 
This is a time to rest, and to reflect, 
as well as tempt you into further exploration.
It is like being a child again, on a new adventure

in the misty green forest, filled with mysteries to discover.
Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day. 
ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Tuesday, 1 December 2015

Do you share empathy with animals?

Do you share empathy with animals?
Composed by me, +Cindy Groulx 

Hi, dear friends and followers. Today I would like to share with you on the topic of Empathy, Intuition and animals. Thank you for coming and I hope you enjoy reading this entry.
You might be empathic towards animals if:

You and your pets know what the other thinks or feels;

Shortly after such an animal was in your thoughts, or you saw a certain animal in a picture or on TV, you encounter a similar type of animal, possibly with someone walking by with a similar pet or an animal you see in the park or in the woods;

Sometimes you feel trapped or confined even though you have plenty of room to move around. Or you catch yourself talking to animals and even insects that attract your attention;

When you look into your pet’s eyes and not only feel what they feel but think you can see right into their being. You feel like you can understand an animals feelings better than you do those of people;

You strongly relate to certain types of animals, (e.g., certain animals and even insects that attract me most, which for me would be too extensive to list here). I was born and raised in woodland country where I spent much of my time in the woods;
Pets find YOU, even though you are not particularly looking for them. (This includes having other family members’ furry friends “adopt” you despite your indifferent manner and lack of attention.).

I find it hard sometimes to enjoy a meal that has animal meat product in it, wondering if that animal suffered before getting to my dinner plate.

At first, this fact seemed counter-intuitive until I further explored my intuitive “hits.”

Highly sensitive people perceive the energy of foods. The cleaner your diet and lifestyle, the more you’ll perceive that energy. For an example: Have you ever looked into a fish’s eyes or seen a fish wriggling on a hook? Does that sensation seem familiar to you?

How can you tell where you are on the animal empathy continuum? Experiment with it!

You can eliminate animal products from your life for two days and then reintroduce them. Pay attention to your immediate reaction as well as to how you feel the following two days. If unsure, ask others to observe your mood and behavior without telling them why you want to know. If neither you, nor anyone else notices a difference in your energy, mood, level of gratitude or happiness or how animals respond to you, then you can stop here or keep experimenting–your choice.

If you want to continue eating meat, dairy and eggs, then gently acknowledging the sacrifice of the animal’s being for your meal can help you do so in peace. “Tuning in” to animals goes both ways. If you can feel the effects of the animal in the product, then you can also tune in to the animal’s spirit to offer a quick thank you.

A person who is empathetic towards animals gathers information in the same way an intuitive empathetic person does. The main difference is that this is an area of specialized intuitive work. Not all who are intuitive or empathetic can feel animals, and vice versa.
For me, since I have been around wilderness and domestic animals since the age of five, I can easily tune into their emotions when I am around them and aware of them and even If I am not aware of them they make themselves noticed.

I can easily discern why an animal is behaving a certain way and what effect, if any, an owner may have on the animal.

As an intuitive, I can feel what is causing the emotional reaction of a certain domestic pet or wilderness animal. It is all about what they feel from you. If you are an angry or a negative person who simply doesn’t care, or even notice the animal is there, then naturally the animal will do its utmost to make itself scarce. For the animal it works quite the opposite as well if it feels friendly, loving energy from that person.
Remember that our pets and livestock are very sensitive and intuitive as well. They are able to pick up on our own emotional states and patterns fairly easily. Often times animals will act them out or resist against them which in turn causes them unnecessary stress and physical discomfort.
Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day. 
ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Monday, 30 November 2015

How Can I Ever Trust Again?

How Can I Ever Trust Again?
November 23, 2015 · by Lorna Tedder · in Relationships

Hi, Dear Friends and Followers. Thank you very much for visiting and reading my blog. Today's topic of discussion is about trust. Have you had so many trust issues in your life that you find it hard to trust enough to make new friends? Orange (notes) are my own.

Ser alguien en quien pueda confiar, no se trata de promesas de hacer las cosas para mí, promete ser conmigo, o promete ser un buen administrador de mi corazón. Es, en cambio, trata de hacer, sobre las acciones, sobre la prueba inherente a en su apoyo.
For the last two years, my biggest personal hurdle has been trust. I was burned to ash and left with the constant question of “how can I ever trust anyone again?” How many years would I have to be with someone and how deep would the relationship have to be for me to feel comfortable again that I could trust as I had once before?

Within the first of the last two years, I let two other people into my life, let them get close, and ventured a toe out onto the ice, believing that I could trust.

That I wanted to trust. That I didn’t want to be jaded.

Both were people I had known for quite some time and had never seen any bad behavior from either of them. Unfortunately, they both showed a backstabbing, vindictive side full of deceit that I never would have guessed for either. Then again, I suppose that’s what I was looking for in every relationship, both new and old, platonic or romantic, drawing it to me because I could still smell the smoke in my clothes from the last one.

One of my newer friends, a very gifted intuitive, sat me down about halfway through the second year and talked to me about trust.

“How could I ever trust anyone again?” I asked her. “I’ve been trying but every new person to walk into my life seems to be a reflection of a past relationship. And as soon as their wavering images solidified into something recognizable, I ran like hell for fear of being manipulated again.”

“You will trust again,” my intuitive friend assured me. “You have much happiness coming to you. And you will–” she emphasized will yet again– “you will trust again. More quickly and more deeply than you can imagine.”

Note: My partner has mentioned this to me many times on days when I have discussed this matter about friends. It almost seems like I carry an aura around me that spells the word "sucker" or "kick me." Yet I would do anything to reach out to others if they needed it. I am a very caring and loving individual who wishes she had a bandage for every scraped knee in the world. Maybe people can see this, and this is the part of my nature that of which people like to take advantage. 
I shook my head. “I just don’t see it,” I told her. “I mean, how can I ever get there? It would take–oh, I don’t know–at least five years, maybe a decade, before I could ever trust anyone again.”

She laughed at me. “I don’t know how, just that you do. And that you go through a long tunnel before it happens. But it’s not too far off. The weather will still be warm.”

I woke on a warm September morning and knew that everything had changed. I couldn’t say what had made it change, exactly. My astrologer friends reminded me that Venus had gone direct during the night, but it seemed something more. I woke knowing that there are people in my life that I trust with my life, and this knowing was sudden. It hadn’t always been so, or if it had, it hadn’t always been obvious, but I had a small handful of close friends and family who would back me up on anything. Though I tend not to ask for help, I knew that any one of them would come to my rescue if I were truly in trouble.

Note: Unfortunately I have no one on the outside. Most of my friends from the past have either moved on or passed on, and I do not have any family to depend on. They have lives of their own to live. 
I have but one person in my life and that is my roommate. She is my rock; without her I would be lost.
As for friends both in real time or online, I will always be there for them, but as for close bonds, it seems to get harder because when these bonds fall apart, it hurts me too deeply 

I knew because of little things that they had done, that meant so much. Not because of promises that weren’t kept. When one of my children was in a serious car accident, my brother rushed to the out-of-town ER to be with her until I could get there. When I was too sick to take another step, my adrenals overstressed and me not knowing how I could keep being everyone else’s pillar of strength in a particular situation, it was my younger daughter who, out of the blue, decided to come be with me and be my pillar of strength. When my heater died on a record twelve degree night, my friend Trae volunteered to leave his family (and his warm home) and drive 40 miles to get out in the cold with a flashlight and tools to get my heat going again sometime between midnight and 1 AM.

None of these instances were times when I had to ask for help, let alone beg for help. They each saw that I was in need and they were there for me. These are only three instances that come to mind now. There are more, both from these blessed people in my life as well as from others. All people I can trust, and people I do trust.

But I woke on a September morning knowing that it’s not about promises to do things for me, promises to be with me, or promises to be a good steward of my heart. It is, instead, about doing, about actions, about the proof inherent in their support.
The other thing that has changed since my intuitive friend told me I would be able to trust again is that I now can trust myself. I’ve heard it said that people who have a problem trusting others really have a problem trusting themselves. I don’t think that’s entirely true. When someone actively kills your trust in them by lying or manipulating, it’s more than a matter of being able to trust yourself, but I understand now the point about trusting yourself first.

I trust myself now in ways I never did before because I’ve now done that deep personal excavation of understanding my childhood and understanding how my father’s mental illness shaped my view of the world. I understand that my strength comes from the worst wounds in my life, as far back as three years old and as recent as two years ago.

Note: I trust myself to continue to do what I can for all who care to share with me on a daily basis. I need to care and love others because that is who I am.  I will be there for all as always, just not with the same deep emotional attachment as I have had in the past, but I will be there. With love.
I trust myself now. I trust myself that I will always be all right and that there will always be people in my life who truly are worthy of my faith in them.
Thank you very much again, dear friends, for visiting my blog. Please share your thoughts with us, if you will. Have a great day. 
ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ

Sunday, 29 November 2015

How to love Mondays


Hi, dear friends and followers. I have run into this article on google I thought I would share with you. I hope it is of some help to you. Thank you for visiting and reading my blog
How to love Mondays
Does your Monday bring a new beginning or an end to your free weekend? Viki Wilson discovers how to bring calm energy and optimism to the start of the working week'Mondays are so unforgiving. I used to think my commute and job were to blame,’ says Jennifer, 34. ‘But since I became a freelance illustrator, enjoying working from home, I find Mondays to be equally dreadful – and so do my freelance friends.’

For most of us, Mondays mean waking to a familiar sense of gloom as we return to the stresses and demands of work. A recent survey of 11,000 workers, commissioned by the consultancy Mercer, revealed we’re more likely to be ill or take time off at the start of the week, with 35 percent of all sick days falling on a Monday. And a study carried out by
Dr Robert Peters of Maryland University showed that heart attacks peak on that day of the week, even if we don’t work.

Why is Monday gloom so widespread, even when we are in fulfilling jobs? ‘Most of us habitually attach negative meanings to the day. ‘We associate Mondays with a loss of freedom. We miss choosing how we will spend our time.’ Monday marks the end of days shared with family and friends or relaxed, free hours. So how can we stop our mood from sinking when Sunday draws to a close?
Finding freedom
One way to counter the sense of lost freedom is to remember that we have chosen the Mondays we face – doing whatever jobs we do. ‘Remind yourself you can always walk away. ‘This retrieves your personal power. With that, you’re able to own the day and choose the outcome you want.’

Change your mindset
A little forward planning can help us start the week more smoothly. ‘We make Mondays so much more miserable by believing we should be more productive,’ says Martin Boroson, author of The One Moment Master. ‘But Mondays are not the time for challenging work. There’s no point in cold calling, making a sales pitch or having a difficult conversation.

‘Monday mornings are the perfect time to do things that can make the rest of the week more productive, such as cleaning out some files or, better still, clarifying your goals for the week.’

‘Another good way to begin thinking differently about Mondays is to start doing things differently on that day, 
 says psychologist Anne Archer, editor of 101 Coaching Strategies And Techniques. ‘Making small, incremental changes will have a powerful effect on the way you think and feel. On Sunday, list five small things you could do differently on Monday. For example, give yourself an extra 10 minutes in the morning to read a book. Yes, most of us are rushing around on Mondays, but just imagine how much calmer and motivated you’ll feel to get out of bed, if you start the day this way.

‘Think up strategies like this for various parts of the day. Have something different for breakfast or, if you can’t eat, drink a glass of warm water cooled from the kettle to get your digestive system going.’

Clearing your mind with mini meditations can help you to feel calmer. ‘Few of us have time to relax on a Monday, but moments of stillness in the day can be beneficial,’ says Boroson.

‘Try this exercise, The Basic Minute, at work: create a place of solitude (the loo is often the best place!). Sit down. Set a watch or mobile phone alarm for exactly one minute. Put your legs and hands in relaxed but fixed positions. Close your eyes and allow your mind to settle into your breathing. When the alarm goes off, stop. By doing just a little meditation, you will be a bit more at peace with the day.’

Harness the Friday feeling
Adding a few weekend-style treats to your working week can make Mondays feel a little less stressful. ‘Many of us live for the weekend and look forward to having the time to rest, see friends, go shopping or out for a meal,’ says psychologist and career coach Denise Taylor.

‘But if we make time, there’s nothing to stop us having a mid-week date with friends or going to the cinema after work. Why keep all the fun stuff and good times for the weekend?’
‘Knowing that you will leave slightly early on a Wednesday to recharge will make the week seem less daunting.

You can do a lot on Friday to make Monday more bearable. ‘At the weekend, we often carry work worries home, ticking over in our subconscious minds,’ says Houlston. ‘On Friday nights, have a little “hand over” ritual, as if you were going on holiday. Write a to-do list, and get everything in place for Monday.’

‘List five things you have done really well that week,’ says Archer. ‘Then list two things that you will do differently next week. That way you will get a sense of achievement, and feel that you are learning and progressing.’

Body and soul
When you do reach the weekend, adopt healthy habits to help you feel happier and more energetic as Monday approaches. ‘Don’t forget the mind and body are interconnected,’ says Archer. ‘The food you eat, the sleep you get, and how active you are alters your body chemistry, which in turn alters your moods and thoughts.’

‘Resist the temptation to sleep in – you’ll find it harder to wake on Monday morning,’ says Dr Kem Thompson, GP and author of Inspirational Blueprints For Personal Success For Women. ‘Eat three meals plus two snacks a day, to keep energy levels constant.’

‘Avoid the temptation to de-stress by drinking lots of alcohol,’ says Archer, ‘It will contribute to an energy crash on Monday. Nurture your body, instead. Walk more and eat well.
‘Above all, stop telling yourself that you dread Mondays. The truth is, for most of us, Mondays are not too bad – and with a few little changes to our thinking habits, we can reclaim a day when the whole week lies untouched in front of us, full of potential.’
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ڰۣIn Loving Light from the Fairy Ladyڰۣ